09.15.07

Top Ten Tips for Bowser to Defeat Mario

Posted in Top Tens, Video Games at 5:50 pm by earl

 

  1. Lock the your door. Mario isn’t that strong.
  2. Employ Kratos or Master Chief as your first boss. You’ll never hear from Mario again.
  3. Take all of the mushrooms out of the castle.
  4. STOP THROWING WEAPONS!!!!!! THIS MEANS KOOPA SHELLS!!!!!!!!!!
  5. Get out of your little smiley face thing and fight like a man. Your 6 feet taller than him. Do the math.
  6. Wear a helmet.
  7. Stop kidnapping Princess Peach.
  8. Kidnap Luigi instead. He’s second banana, and noone in Mushroom Kingdom would care. 
  9. Really mess things up and kidnap Zelda. TEAM UP WITH GANONDORF!!!!!!!
  10. Buy a security system.

Old to New School Video Games

Posted in The Way Earl Sees It at 5:43 pm by earl

         

As we all know, there are several new video games that are coming out that are spreading out brand new series, and will possibly last for years to come. But what about old school games like Mario and Sonic? Can they still survive in a new enviroment full of shiny graphics, gameplay innovations, and the soon to be beaten Blu-ray? Or will they just eat the dust like Sonic has and be only remembered as a distinct memory that will never receive an update? And if so, which of our newer series will meet that fate, and when?

Well, the Way I see it, there are a couple of different answers. Back in the 80s we received Mario, the Italian plumber who was rescuing Peach from the cruel hands of Bowser over and over again. And just about 5 months ago we received his newest installment, Super Paper Mario, which was a huge success. And we planning on getting another one in November. So we could definitely say that Mario, the old-school king, is still reigning on his throne. And he’s not the only one. Old-school superstars like Metroid, Zelda, and more are still kicking butt after 20 years! However, some characters fail to meet that expectation, like Sonic. Before you Sonic Fans (Steven and The Dirty Kid) fly off the handle, take a look at these scores of the last few Sonic games since its last good game, Sonic Adventure Battle 2. Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)-2 out of 5, Shadow the Hedgehog-2 out of 5/ 1 out of 5/ Worst Game of the Year, not to mention all the other games that were even worse than Larry the Cably Guy:Health Inspector. Sure, Sonic has had some good games, but with 50 good games and only about 15 being good, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. Overall, when it comes to if old school games will live or die, it’s all a matter of content. One reason Sonic games fail is because of their new, trying to be hip content, which fails miserably, one reason we loved the original was because it was just fun to run and attack Eggman. We don;t really care about the emo-style whinings of Shadow. And series like Metroid which have new content and yet succeed do that because the new content is actually worthwhile. If you decide to add new content, do it right.